Dia De Los Muertos

Today is Dia De Los Muertos. I see it as  highly celebrated here in Cali more like a 2nd Halloween/carnival type day. Anyway  I guess I've been weirdly reminded that my dad hasn't been with me for almost 23 yrs now and I got to thinking about the relationship I had as a baby girl w him and the one that I have with him today. Yes, I have a relationship w him today I talk to him often. As of about 6 months now i wanted to connect with him and started having conversations in my head with him. Believe me it's the best thing I've done for myself. At first it was just me carrying conversation then shortly after It started happening. Butterflies or mainly one butterfly always coming out of no where flying into my face calling for my attention. I understand that maybe I sound off but I've always been able to feel things even as a young girl, energies other people's energies. This is like that but it's a different energy, very low key energy but once you realize it, it's pleasantly strong. Birds flying into me in a playful manner. It took me a while to except it so I test him asking if its him to show me the butterfly or give me a sign and he does. Honestly it's made me a happier person to be able to connect w my dad. That being said I wanted to say that my dad died when I was 10. He was a heroin addict and was for some years and for the last 2yrs of his life he wasn't in mine, But before that he lived across the street from us and always made time to see us kids even if it was a weird random hour. Him and I had a special connection. I didn't see him as a druggie I knew more less what he did but first and foremost he was my magic dad my adventure buddy who would take me either in a nice forgein car or a beach cruiser around the town buying me a roast beef sandwich, tacos or dehydrated shrimps w hot sauce. He would take me to downtown LA and we would eat at Cliftons, these outing  usually happened late at night. We would have conversations about the stars, music and all the things he aspired to accomplish. My dad was a big time dreamer and lover of life. I didn't see him as an addict I saw him as a very creative loving man and I somehow had kind of eased my way into his world where very few got to visit. I don't think many knew him as I did and that's mainly because our relationship was unique because I was a little girl version of him. He was an artist, a mechanic, an entrepreneur and very cool social butterfly. I love my dad and miss him very much but I know he is free from addiction wherever he is and loves us still.